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25 ways to say “I love you”

Icy Blue Heart

There’s nothing quite as beautiful as a simple “I love you.”

This Valentine’s Day we looked to Lifters in the Tell My Wife I Love Her habit (our most popular love habit) for inspiration on how to say those three words more often. They’ve said “I love you” to their partners over 25,000 [UPDATE 9/27: 65,000] times since we launched.

Before we get into the tips, we feel obligated to mention one of the major outcomes. 52% of people in this “I love you” habit reported an improved sex life, with the inclusion of more exciting bedroom adventures, like the addition of adult sites like to spice up the atmosphere.

Here are some ideas for how to say “I love you”– they’re relevant no matter whom you’re in love with:

How to express your love in words:

  • Told her I have a crush on her and that she is amazing. 🙂
  • In small or surprising ways, like looking up from a book I am reading, across the room from her and simply saying, “Oh, you know what? I love you!”
  • 10 times before noon
  • Used emoji
  • Via email but it still counts!

Simple but meaningful acts of service:

  • Said it with a plate of fresh strawberries in a heart shape.
  • She was sick in bed. I brought her tea and told her “I love you” when I left for work.
  • Gave her my Pop-Tart.
  • Changed the oil in her car!
  • Took the baby to the living room to let her sleep.

Gift you can give:

  • As she’s recently started working from home, I’ve begun to leave notes around the house for her to find throughout the day!
  • Brought home an apricot chocolate ganache for her.
  • I call organizations she is working with or locations she is at and have them send her a message or announce it over the loud speaker.
  • Brought some flowers home for my wife. Sometimes you don’t need words.
  • I think about her throughout the day so I’ll send her texts or pictures of things that remind me of her, places I visit, or anything that sparks a memory or will make her laugh.

How to show your love through touch:

  • Told her while we cuddled watching the snow fall at 5am.
  • With a smile, a hug, and a kiss!
  • With a big long hug!!!
  • In public, holding hands, showing her off to the world (we’ve been married 26 years this year).
  • Sweetly in her ear before she wakes up.

Ideas for spending quality time together:

  • Just set up a hot bubble bath, some jazz music, candles & a glass of wine followed by a foot massage for my wife after her busy day dealing with the kids.
  • Going to a posh dinner tonight.
  • I love it when we have a few minutes to chat in the morning before starting our days.
  • At the movie theater.
  • Seeing her each day on a FaceTime call is a blessing, while she is thousands of miles away across the ocean.

Why track this habit?

Many Lifters tracking Tell My Wife I Love Her had already built the habit of saying “I love you” to their wives (given they were still married to them). Here’s why they wanted to track the habit:

  • I found myself telling my kids I loved them 10 times in a single day but not saying it once to my wife.
  • Even small gestures like an “I really love you” out of the blue can go a long way toward making our wives smile and keeping the relationship moving in a positive direction.
  • To improve my marriage.
  • It makes me feel good and reinforces a beneficial behavior.
  • I’m too busy and constantly on the run. I found myself not stopping to tell my partner how grateful I was for her… I told my wife I loved her everyday before this, but not with the intention that I do now.

In the self-tracking space, numbers tend to get all of the attention. We’ve learned in the six months since launch that habits hardest to quantify like Tell My Wife I Love Her, Write Three Positive Things About Today and Be Grateful For Something or Someone can have the greatest impact on your happiness. The scientific research backs this up, too.


1. We embrace the entire community and hope that these tips can be applied in wife to husband and parter to partner interactions.

2. Taken from survey responses and check-in notes left on Lift. You may have noticed that we mapped the tips to the five love languages, which you can read more about here.

3. Yes, there is a Tell My Husband I Love Him habit.

Track this habit and others on Lift, available in the App Store and soon on the web. Follow us on Twitter: @liftapp.

Image: © CC SquiffyEye on Flickr